420 ftw
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
you will always have a special place in my vag
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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