I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
