Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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