the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
