I am puke
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
