I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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