He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
