walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
