Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
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