I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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