she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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