I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
