I'll bet she douches with gravy.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize