Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
