She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
