Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
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