I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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