Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
