So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
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