I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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