Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
