I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
