you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
