That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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