Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Is it because I queefed?
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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