I want to make a zoo with you.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
