It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
