dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
