I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
