man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
