the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
