Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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