dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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