Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
