i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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