Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Randomize
