my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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