We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
