There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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