11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
