I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
