I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Randomize
