I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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