Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
My ass is underappreciated
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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