I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Randomize
