Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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