We're like a lot better than the average bears
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Liz is crying about burritos again.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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