If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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