Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
