can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
